Posts filed under humor

I'm The Crazy Grandma Lady

So I'm really social. And by social, I mean I run errands on Friday nights because I run into the least amount of people that way. This past Friday, I went to Bed Bath and Beyond to get a present for a friend. It was really fun. I had a gift card. I got some makeup.

Yes, there is a point to this.

When I was in high school, all the cool kids would hang out in the parking lot of the local Kroger (or "Krogers," as many Southerners would say). I was never invited to hang out there. I've decided it's because I was so beautiful that no one wanted me around to take their boyfriends. (Let's just ignore the fact that I had a unibrow....)

Well, in fancy-pants Franklin, Tennessee, it is apparently no different. At exactly 9pm, I walk out to my car from the store and was greeted by THIS.

photo Ok, so the picture doesn't do it much justice, but it shows a glimmer into the amount of lil' whippersnappers that were surrounding my car.

If I were to guess, I'd say around 10 million high schoolers were there.

OKAY, I'm exaggerating. More like 200. But seriously. 200 teenagers is approximately 199 too many teenagers.

They were EVERYWHERE. And they were doing lots of things that The United States and Tennessee laws have deemed slightly illegal in nature, like drinking and smoking and... cuddling.

Then all of a sudden, I turned into Crazy Grandma. I picked up my proverbial walking stick and started yelling.


"Where are you parents?! When I was your age, blah blah blah... YOUNG LADY, YOUR SKIRT IS TOO SHORT!"

Gosh, I am so old.

Nashville Preds Semi-Finals recap! (And Reba)

Okay, before I get started, I need to do something real quick...  


30th Annual American Music Awards

That's Reba. She's cheering for me.

WOW. Reba is so excited about me winning the Preds game Smash Hit semi-finals! She can't believe I made it to the finals that happen Friday April 12th, 2013!

Thanks, Reba, for all your support!* (please note SMALL disclaimer at end of this post)

I am so thankful for this opportunity. That's so cliché to say/write, but I really mean it. To be able to play for 19,000-something people for two whole games, and now a THIRD!

I'm VERY tempted to wear a billboard somewhere on my body with my website and contact information on it for the next game. I ain't above it.

For this last performance, I sang Dolly Parton's "Jolene," and it was a blast! It's dark, it's twisted, it's soulful-ish, it's the south, it's everything.

There was one other guy I was competing with - Mitchell Tenpenny. He was awesome. And SO cool. Oh, Competition, you try and divide us, but it ain't gonna work. People are awesome, and we singer-type need all the support we can get.

I somehow managed to get the highest amount of votes, and I will be singing one more time for this competition.

BAH, I really hope I get this.

April 12th. Friday. 2013. Tickets are cheaper right now. StubHub has 'em, Craig's List has 'em, the world is your hockey puck(oyster)! Why don't ya grab some and come vote for me? *bats eyelashes*

I leave you with a couple more pictures from the game. Yeehaw!

2preds3 2preds1 2preds2

*Technically, Reba does not know me from Adam, nor does she know I am using this picture. TECHNICALLY, I might have just googled "woohoo!" and this picture popped up, and I just ganked it off the Internet, blah blah....



Irreverent Funnies

Here are some more funnies from my Pinterest page I thought you might enjoy! :D

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

...I shall leave you with this little bit of irreverence. Jesus would SO laugh at this. ;)

Posted on March 19, 2013 and filed under funny, humor, pinterest, quotes.

Weekend Update

movin' and shakin'

This past Thursday, my husband and I drove to Georgia to have a creative meeting with the producer and his team.

On the way there, we stopped in Chattanooga and went to the Tennessee Aquarium and Cheeburger Cheeburger (a famous burger place). We went in honor of our 1st wedding anniversary that happened yesterday (Sunday). aaaawww :P I have one picture from it. You really don't wanna see it. It's very lame.


See, I told you. Moving on...

We made it to Georgia. Valdosta, GA to be exact. Home of the - well, I'm not real sure yet. We did find a $2.50 movie theater and a few pawn shops. And we found one of those parking lot fairs, too. But we didn't do any of it because we have no money we're extremely fancy.

We met Mark the producer, Jim the business guy, and Steve the assistant, at the new studio.

photo 2

Yes, this is it. This is what a Grammy winner's studio looks like. Okay, maybe not ALL of them, but swampy, soulful, southern ones can make this old building a bad@$$ music-making hub.

'Don't judge a book by it's cover' would be an appropriate reminder at this moment.

Anyways, My husband played guitar, and I played a little piano, and we played through my songs. We re-worked a couple of things, but every song is being kept the same as I had written them. Pretty awesome. :)

photo 1

That's Mark there on the right. :)

After the meeting, we left the next day to play a show at The Rookery in Macon, GA. We like them there, and it's a good place to try out new songs.


Then, we got up the next morning, visited with my cute lil Nana Banana,

photo 3

...and then went back home to recoup. I'm still recouping. I'm sleepy. Somebody gimme a Red Bull. No, please don't give me a Red Bull, that stuff tastes like ABC bubble gum dipped in dirty Koolaid.

K, bye!

Pinterest Funnies

Here are some things I've found on Pinterest (and beyond) that made me laugh. Hope these make you happy! :) You should come join me over there, it's fun! And if nothing else, you can go look at what I've pinned here!

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

"Yell Ding Dong Really Loud!"

When I zone out, and I do quite often, my fingers move across the computer keys and magically land me in the crazy abyss that is the "Humor" section of Pinterest. Here are some of the crazy and funny things I've found lately. Hope they make you happy!  <3

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: via Jessie on Pinterest

Posted on February 4, 2013 and filed under funny, humor, pinterest, quotes.

Jessie's Book Review for N00bs

I just finished a book called “Lone Wolf,” by Jodi Picoult. images

I skimmed the back and concluded that this book was about a lonely man.

Aww! That sounds sweet, doesn't it?

"To evict a wolf from a pack, you use natural suppression and intimidation...."

Hey! That's not about a little ol' lonely man.

"At first I didn't know if the young female wolf was testing me.... So I lifted the deer leg to my mouth and started to eat. How did the raw meat taste? Like the finest filet."

Aw, MAN.

How was I supposed to know that “Lone Wolf” would be about WOLVES? *hand hitting forehead*

While I appreciate wolves as much as the next guy, it was like thinking you have a Coke and taking a swig of sweet tea.

So, if you’re interested in getting this book, BE FOREWARNED...

“Lone Wolf” is about WOLVES. I know it’s a stretch, but really, it is.

Posted on February 4, 2013 and filed under humor, Lifestyle, pinterest.